


the very first

by orphan_account



Series: letters [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen, Letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 19:26:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7904710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account





	the very first

L,

I miss you.

I miss you.

I miss you.

\-----  


You told me to stop.

I told you I couldn't.

That was the biggest mistake I ever made.

And I'm so sorry for everything that came after.

\-----

Warm. That was the temperature of exactly two things that day. The air, and your smile.

You always told me you never did bad things.

You did.

You stole my heart.

You haven't given it back yet.

\-----

I said I loved you. I meant it. I wasn't joking when I said that.

You were. 

You told me you were scared.

I accepted that.

And I waited for you to stop being scared.

And waited.

And waited.

And waited.

You never stopped being scared.

\-----  


You held my hand so many times.

If I focus, I can still feel the soft, warm feeling I got when you did.

It wasn't just my hand that felt that way.

\-----

You told me you wanted to be pretty.

I told you you already were.

You didn't believe me.

I knew you didn't.

But I didn't said anything.

Because I trusted that one day I would tell you, and you would believe me.

That day never came.

\-----

I got into fights.

Fights that didn't turn out well for me.

Like the time I got a concussion in the cafeteria because I was trying to impress you.

I was stupid.

I fought to fight.

And often it left me a mess.

You weren't impressed.

But I kept trying.

\-----

We took each others first kiss.

Maybe it was a dare.

I still think it was the best kiss I ever had.

It lasted no more than a second.

But that was all it took to make me breathless.

\-----  


You told me about how you wanted to be a singer.

You showed me the video of you playing guitar.

I still dream of your voice.

\-----

Your boyfriend and I never got along.

We pretended because even though we loathed each other...

We put your happiness first.

He stopped putting you first after a while.

I never did. 

\-----

The last time I saw you was the worst day of my life.

I know that day was a long time coming but it still stung.

I didn't deserve you in the first place.

I certainly didn't have the right to ask you to stay.

But I did anyway.

\-----

You'll probably never see this.

That's okay.

I wouldn't really want you to.

I know you're happy now.

And that's enough to keep me smiling.

 

Forever yours,

J


End file.
